I love this quote from “Beverly Clark” (Susan Sarandon) in “Shall We Dance?”
“We need a witness to our lives. There’s a billion people on the planet… I mean, what does any one life really mean? But in a marriage, you’re promising to care about everything. The good things, the bad things, the terrible things, the mundane things… all of it, all of the time, every day. You’re saying ‘Your life will not go unnoticed because I will notice it. Your life will not go un-witnessed because I will be your witness’.”
Have you noticed? Have you cared? About what good things? About what bad things? About what terrible things? About what mundane things? When is the last time you demonstrated how much you cared? How did you demonstrate how much you care? Does your spouse really believe you care? Did you care enough to ask when no one else did? To listen when no one else might have taken the time? Have you cared enough to notice some of the things that would definitely have slipped by other friends and family in your spouse’s life?
And, when your spouse lets you down, remember what Joni Eareckson Tada said in her book “Joni and Ken: An Untold Love Story:” “If husbands and wives were all they expected each other to be, neither would feel much inclination to depend on the Lord… All of this thinking had led her to a firm conclusion: Christians should remember to place their ultimate hope in God Himself, whose love never varies, and who is always trustworthy, always kind, always faithful, and who never misses a single detail.”
Make sure you care. Make sure you notice. Make sure you take the time so that your spouse knows and believes you care and notice all of the time, every day.
